You know you are on the right track when you are surrounded by a group of people who are all saying the same thing:

I am super excited. I got bored. I didn’t want to get too comfortable. I want to grow. I want to create. I want a better world. I want to spend my time on things that matter. I believe we can do good and make money at the same time. I believe design shapes culture, which shapes everything else. I love that I am a part of the inaugural class. I love the diversity in the class but our paths are crossing. I just got to Austin. Can we get to work yet? I had doubts, but I’m over them. And, did I already mention I’m super excited?

Well, looks like there is only one way left to go – Forward. Even if it really has to take 10,000 hours of hard work.

I am not fond of goodbyes. After becoming so emotionally attached to the beautiful people I have come to build a relationship with, I never really learned how to part with them without feeling a part of me is being taken away.

But I think I will have to. Learning about the science behind the psychological need for us to travel, and believing the value of educating children using the world as a classroom, it looks like saying goodbyes will be a normal for the rest of my life. I will have to learn how to not think it’s the end of something, but rather, the beginning of something else. Or in the wise words of Dr. Suess, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”

Another new phase of my little life journey begins , starting with a roadtrip.

View Toronto to Austin in a larger map

When work gets overwhelming, my boss would say to me, “No freaking out.” I would nod in agreement and respond, “Rule number 1″, then we go on and focus on the tasks at hand.

As preparation for my new journey got overwhelming, my boss knowingly said again, “Rule applies even in Texas.” I nodded again and responded, “Right.” But really, what I wanted to say was, “Look, it’s hard not to. It’s the biggest risk I have taken in my mere 24 years of life!”

Drawing from the wisdom of various individuals over the past few weeks, I scrambled to find reasons for why I should not freak out, and here are what I came up with:

1. I don’t need to freak out, because my Asian roots supposedly make me less happy when decisions are made solely by me. Based on Sheena Iyengar’s experiment on how we make choices, apparently Asian-Americans have a much stronger tendency to seek approval on decisions from their immigrant parents when compared to their Anglo-American peers. That explains the nagging feeling I have when making this decision – staying true to myself and my aspiration as opposed to trying to satisfy someone else’s expectations. And knowing the cause of the uneasiness put me back at ease.
2. I don’t need to freak out, because it’s harder to be kind than to be clever. As Jeff Bezos, founder and CEO of Amazon, learned from his grandfather, that cleverness is a gift while kindness is a choice. As I author my own life from scratch, I might not take pride in all the talents I have yet to develop, but I take pride in the choices I made today. Because in the end, we are our choices.
3. I don’t need to freak out, because advancement doesn’t only happen when you’re doing what you’re good at. The secret to success, as shared by Danielle Laporte, is doing what you say you’re going to do. We all know that in itself is hard enough.
4. I don’t need to freak out, because passion is overrrated. I cringe when people say to me, “Everything will be fine because you’re following your passion!” Well, what if it turns out that this isn’t my passion? I agree with Sacha that sometimes we put too much emphasis on waking up one morning and being swept away by some grand passion then everything in life will automatically falls into place. If passion is really built from skills and intention, good –  I can do that. I am a fast learner, and with good intentions. =)
5. I don’t need to freak out, because Austin is weird. “Keep Austin Weird” is the slogan originally adopted to promote small businesses in the city. More importantly though, Austin is “weird” because of its creative culture in a mostly conservative Texas. I can’t wait to see Amy again, my amazing couchsurfer host during my 1st visit to Austin. I’m also very excited to meet new friends like Sunni Brown and Jessica Shortall who were kind enough to reach out on Twitter to welcome me already, as well as the amazing individuals in the inaugural class of Austin Center for Design. Hey, who knows, maybe I will even bump into Esther Havens and get her autograph for Kris.
6. I don’t need to freak out, because we build our team by pushing each other away as far as possible. I don’t know where I would be today without my team. Luckily, in contrast to most teams, we don’t try to stay together. We push each other to go after each of our own’s interests and dreams. We expand our team by expanding each of our own’s skills, networks, geographies, and capacities. Stay tuned for stories from Vancouver, Austin, Stockholm, Singapore, or Rio, on early childhood education, interaction design, social finance, mobile development, or community engagement.
7. I don’t need to freak out, because when you feel your heart being pulled in a certain direction, you simply follow and don’t question. “Your work is to discover your work, and then with all your heart, to give yourself to it” is the quote Ian MacKenzie followed while putting together the film documentary for the “One Week Job” project. According to dictionary.com, work is defined as “exertion or effort directed to produce or accomplish something”. So let us do just that.

There. Look at my 17-month-old little cousin. She walks every step with a struggle. But before we know it, she’ll be running. We sometimes forget that it’s okay to fall.

After reading Grace‘s entry on “Accountability: Showing Up To Blog“, I have been feeling guilty about my own lack of presence on this blog. Not going to deny – it is true that I have let other priorities in life taken precedence over reflecting on my actions and connecting with people. Fortunately, I read Sacha‘s piece on “Thoughts on writing and starting again“. As usual, she makes everything easier to digest and comprehend. She suggested there is no need to beat myself up for stopping; instead, I should focus on enjoying that I’m starting again.

This is a good time to start again. In the last couple of months, I have been busy putting together my portfolio to apply to Austin Center for Design for their Interaction Design and Social Entrepreneurship program. I am thrilled that I have been accepted and will be joining the inaugural class starting this August. There was obviously the struggle of doing this now vs later. But in the end, I decided “now” will always be the best time (and Akhila says it best). Everyone has a “I wish I did this when I was younger” story, and I promised myself, as well as my mentors, that I will do this now (“because I can”, as Keri Smith beautifully described).

I have been interested in using design to affect social change ever since I learned about the collaboration between IDEO and Acumen Fund on The Ripple Effect Project, the MDes in Strategic Foresight and Innovation started by OCAD, the Massive Change exhibition, Project H Design, and many others. In the near future, I might (and I hope to) be fortunate enough to take part in projects such as GE ecomagination, IBM Smarter Planet, or Project Masiluleke. Or I might be bold enough to start my own initiative. What’s ahead of me is unclear, and kind of scary. The answer is unknown, yet what’s known is that the possibilities are endless.

I am very excited to be doing this work and I look forward to be blogging about my experiences. It is truly an honor to have the great people I have around me, to support me, to be angry at me, to advise me, and to celebrate with me on starting again: the blog, and the exploration. Thank you.

Photo credit: AC4D Blog

After spending a month putting together my portfolio, I’ve finally submitted. The weather was beautiful this weekend, felt really good spending some time with family and enjoying what Toronto has to offer.